I'm Not Great at Conversation

I'm not sure why, but I frequently find it difficult to keep up a conversation. Anxiety in social situations? Thinking too much? Perhaps a little bit of both. 

And I am sure I am not the only one who feels this

For those of us who face this, communication—such a crucial skill both personally and professionally—can feel like a challenge. We may hear things like, "we're awkward", "we lack empathy", or "we only talk about things we are interested in". 

It’s not that we don’t care or aren’t trying— It is because it is difficult for us to keep up with the discussion when we're battling self-doubt, overanalyzing, and a fear of saying the incorrect thing.

Do I love always talking sports? Yes and no. I love sports; they feel like my calling card in life, the thing I’m most passionate and knowledgeable about. But in reality, there’s a part of me that hates that I always find a way or feel a need to bring them up in conversation.

They just kind of serve as a kind of safety net, something I use when I'm at a loss for words or when there is a long period of pause when I am around others. Truthfully, I do have concerns that people might view me to be indifferent or uninterested in what they have to say, because it's often not true. I just don't know what else to do a majority of the time.

Although I'm not an expert or coach, I've found that sharing my personal experiences has been beneficial for myself and for those who share similar feelings. 

For those like me, with time, I've discovered that even small actions can have a big impact. Things like trying to plan conversation starters ahead of time, engaging in mindfulness exercises to maintain present-moment awareness, or simply reminding myself that silence or pauses doesn't mean things have become awkward. 

As we try to build genuine relationships, that doesn't mean we need to be great conversationalists. Often, just being present and sincere is enough.

The goal of conversations should be to be present and sincere not to perform or impress. In reality, those who are most important to you will value you for who you are rather than how easily you can maintain a conversation.

Thus, keep in mind that it's okay to take your time, to pause, and to speak when you're ready if you're having trouble. Connection, not perfection, is the ultimate goal. Additionally, your sincere effort will always speak louder than words.